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So very thankful and grateful that God is still really working on me!
I reflected on life as of late and what I’ve recognized is my growth in self. I still have several areas that I can improve in, but this year revealed more as well as truly tested my character. I’m pleased to report that I am who I am (in the most candid way). I also think I’ve finally learned what it means to remain TRUE TO SELF. A laundry list of lessons and life experiences have occurred in my personal life this year, but I feel like I’m now more than I have ever been seeking God’s guidance and direction to intervene on my shortcomings and all-in-all MAKE ME BETTER!
Ever feel guilty to ask God for things?
When life “hits”, I find myself withdrawing and becoming apprehensive to ask God for things. I suppose I experience this because I know that I fall short in keeping HIM constantly in my mix, or I feel guilty for not talking to him or being as grateful as I should be on a daily basis. But, when I need HIM, I call on him right away. All of sudden, I started this new thing where I feel undeserving of God’s love, assistance, forgiveness, grace, and mercy in my moments of need. Whew! I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that those feelings amplified, even more, this year. Battling this has felt mentally draining to the 1,000,000th power. It had gotten to the point that every time I needed God and should have been calling on HIM, I’d tell myself, “nah, God is disappointed in you, or there’s so much more he could use his energy on, or there are many more people who deserve his attention,” etc.
GUESS WHAT? I know that has been nothing but the enemy in my ear using his conniving antics to draw me even further away from God. Though it took me about 11 months to recognize my self-sabotage, I have been practicing to immediately thank God in the moments my mind says something else. I call out to HIM, asking that I feel his love regardless of how much I mess up or make mistakes. I’ve made bigger strides to not take his grace and mercy for granted. I am acknowledging more and more that God knows all of my flaws and imperfections, but regardless, I still belong to him which means he still has my back.
It’s been on my heart to share this because perhaps you’ve felt like this at some point in your life or maybe you can relate presently. Either way, each day is an opportunity to reset and allow God in your life. It’s our nature to figure things out on our own, or we tend to want/need to fight our battles alone. Truth is we don’t have to. When we chill out and remain still, God works his wonderous powers in our lives. Sometimes, he gets our attention in inconvenience, interruption, or maybe in the most downright uncomfortable way possible.
“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.”
Matthew 6:33 spells it out loud and clear for us and is what I consider to be one of the blueprints that produces peace and prosperity forever and ever in our lives! HE is still working in and on me, and hopefully, y’all allow him to do so in your lives too!
Peace and Forever Blessings,